I write because...

I write because I am not expresive,
it's funny but this is who I am and how I live.
I have learned to easily forgive,
and not keep my feelings captive.

I write because I've never been heard,
all my life my questions unanswered,
and yet this is how I am inspired,
to keep my feelings appreciated and treasured.

I write because I am lonely,
no one here to share my thoughts daily,
there is nothing more I want badly,
then to just have a friend who fancies me.

I write because I can't stop thinking,
my mind does not rest or allow me to continue sleeping,
I stay awake and stare at the ceiling,
but all it does is remind me of what I'm feeling.

I write because the world is beautiful to me,
when the sun rises I'm happy as can be,
dispite all the cruelty and sadness I see,
when the sun sets and the day ends.. I know I'm free.

I write because I am in love and always will be,
it's what I feel deeply,
it fills my heart from being empty,
I hope not to loose it because it will mean the end of me.

Regret

I have nothing to offer,
I see no future.. where I can live happily ever after,
when it comes to love I consider myself a failure,
it's no wonder why I've turned into a monster.

I have too many fears and turned them into excuses,
harmless excuses for trying to hide these bruises
my hopes are burried just like my dreams and wishes,
for I care more about my life then riches.

I've lived a life full of regrets,
how I wish I could erase my past and reset,
time is running out and so much I've not done yet,
I'm not ready to say goodbye when the sunsets.

I can't take back what no longer belongs to me,
I can't gain back what I have already lost you see..
this is not what I want my life to be,
if only I am allowed to just remain plain old me.

My heart and soul is what I gave,
it was meant for someone who needed to be saved,
I know life goes on and I must be brave,
maybe one day "I" too will be saved.

Everything

People associate their lives in all forms of art,
but in reality there is always two parts,
love and hate are the same to the heart,
all things must come to an end to experience a new start.

Everything should matter to mankind,
Knowledge and education is what feeds our mind,
ignorance is what makes us blind,
a simple act of kindness and generosity is so hard to find.

Everything is made easy and may seem nice,
we gamble our lives with a piece of dice,
our health can be measured by the latest device,
and life itself can be extended for a fair price.

Everything is not always what it seems,
we only see what we want to see and believe in dreams,
we live in a box where no one hears our screams,
sacrifices we make for our lives to flow like a stream.

Everything is for you to acquire,
Pick and choose as what your heart desires,
beauty is always something to admire,
but it turns ugly when it's love and life expires.

Everything can change in a blink of an eye,
regardless for love or friendship we soon have to say goodbye,
with or without words either one can makes us cry,
should we even question or ask ourselves why?

Another Love Story

My understanding of love has long matured,
my feelings and desires has always been secured,
the harshness of love I have already endured,
because I'm still able to love even when my heart is left uncured.

I've survived the pain of loosing a father,
but I've found comfort from loving another,
he inspires my world like no other,
it's a price I pay with my soul and remain a loner.

A life of solitude is what I chose,
I leave my heart open like the sky so exposed,
only my emotions are the ones that are left closed,
my story ends here I suppose.

The greatest love stories are always the ones that are denied,
stories.. inspired by what was deprived,
love remains a mystery and not easily defined,
mutual understanding is what makes it so divine.

Closure

The thought of a broken heart is so unreal,
we all need is some time to heal,
and only time will one day reveal,
what's in our heart and how we truly feel.

We all have our reasons,
to keep our feelings in prison,
some feelings can't change like the season,
what can change is the person.

As the day pass by... the pain... we'll soon forget,
every day has an end when the sun sets,
there is always a moment to reflect,
and also a time for us to regret.

Sometimes we need closure,
instead of an answer,
there is no need to go through this torture,
because we will find a way to get over.

Sarah McLachlan - I Will Remember You [Official Music Video]

Crayons

When I'm awake... it feels like a dream,
more like a nightmare so it may seem,
I'm trapped in silence and I want to scream,
at times.. it seems a little too extreme.

When I am asleep... I go to other places,
in this world... I see so many familiar faces,
people that relate to good memories I wish not to erase,
they comfort me with so much love and grace.

If given a choice to be awake or asleep,
I would choose the world when I am asleep,
there I know my life I can keep,
I wont feel any pain from what's hurting me skin deep.

I am too afraid to face my fears,
too reserved to even shed a tear,
Perhaps one day my angle will appear,
and I shall sleep in peace for many years.

But before I find peace.. must I experience pain?
what else do I have to loose in order to gain?
Should I be angry at everyone and go insane?
When??... when will I ever be freed from these chains?

I have no choice but to go on,
with my talent I shall colour my life from now on,
and hope all my demons will one day be gone,
from now on I'll draw my new world with my lovely crayons =)

Goodnight Zerah

Tonight the light will no longer hurt my eyes,
the word love no longer applies,
I choose to live in a world with no sunrise,
this world only exist in my mind.. I know it's unwise.

Tonight I'll sleep with no more dreams of tomorrow,
no one dear to hold... just my pillow,
the love in my heart is stolen.. and now it's hollow,
my mind blank with no thoughts.. just zero.

Tonight I whisper no more good nights,
I'll seek the comfort of the moonlight,
I might even be inspired again to write,
new feelings I can keep inside.

Tonight the tears from my eyes will run dry,
my heart does not beat the same way and I know why,
the old me must die and I must say goodbye,
I must make the best of what I have and I must not cry.

I share my thoughts...

I love the sunlight in the morning,
I love walking in the rain,
I love the air that I breathe everyday,
I love the dirt on my feet.

I like the sound of my heart beating,
I like the way I'm feeling,
I like knowing that there is love in my heart,
I like day dreaming...

I wish I was more expressive,
I wish dreams could come true,
I wish to know what happiness is like,
I wish for only love in return.

I want the things I can't have,
I want to feel like everyone else,
I want to be someone else,
I want another chance to live again.

I would like to share my thoughts,
I would like to share my love,
I would like to share my life,
I would like to share my world.

I hate who I am,
I hate how I look,
I hate being alone,
I hate fact that I am still alive.

I feel love,
I feel pain,
I feel death growing inside me,
I feel nothing else.

I regret wasting time,
I regret keeping secrets,
I regret for the wrong choices I've made,
I regret for not listening to my heart.

I've cried myself to sleep,
I've cried for those I love,
I've cried for the things I've said,
I've cried all my life...

I envy those who are able to express,
I envy those who are brave,
I envy those who are strong,
I envy those who are loved.

Cast my heart away...

I have no intentions to confess,
the feelings that once kept me strong is now making me depress,
I find it difficult to express,
my true feelings I have always suppressed.

It's ok to judge me or turn away,
I'm force to explain what I never wanted to say,
I don't expect you to feel the same way,
I'll understand even if the world reject me at the end of the day.

Due to an act so careless,
It is making me feel so anxious,
if you decide the matter should be discussed,
I'm sorry I'm not prepared to be completely honest,

I've held these feelings so secret,
even considered them so private.
I feel I've lost myself along with it,
I failed again in how the massage was transmitted.

For most people Love is just a feeling,
to me it's all I have left worth living,
it's what keeps the sun in my world shinning,
only I can define the true meaning.

There is no words left to say,
there is no way to reverse this day,
now I feel myself slowly drifting away,
my heart is slowly turning gray,
my hope to find love is no longer there....