Weddings?

I’m inspired to write after reading babysiew’s blog about wedding and marriage. Yes it’s true I’m not the type that likes to go for weddings dinners or parties.

I know a lot of people who would like to have a grand wedding. One of my colleague is budgeting a RM30,000 just for the dinner… she is crazy!. Some people want to celebrate if possible with the whole world. I know it’s a happy day and they want their guests to enjoy themselves. It’s custom for the bride and groom to invite their guests and it’s also a custom for the parents to invite their side of the family and their friends, then there are cases where their family members invite their friends to come too.

One example, My sisters wedding June1990, Portuguese Settlement, Malacca. Portuguese custom the wedding normally lasts 3 days. The wedding reception dinner was held in my grand father’s house *mothers side*.

Friday, 1st day “Bachelors Night” for the groom’s side of cause, my family were busy decorating the bedroom, the wedding car and making the flower arrangements… etc.

Saturday, 2nd day “The Wedding!”. I was only 12 years old and yet to be the bride’s maid. The church ceremony was at 3pm. Both sides of the family ware making some last minutes preparations. At 12 noon my eldest brother, the best man, mans sponsor and future brother in law went out to play pool. My sister was late for her hair do because she was waiting for me and trying to contact her husband, man was he pissed at everyone that day. Three of my cousins went out looking for me and there I was in the field playing softball at 1pm. I rushed to take a bath then went to the hair salon, got my hair done then for the first time in my life I had to wear make up and a pink dress with silver trimmings. It totally ruined my tomboy image. I got teased to the max!

Anyway, we manage to get to church on time. My eldest brother Colin gave my sister away because at that time my father couldn’t walk, so he waited for her at the Alter. The ceremony was lovely. When the time came for the priest to serve the host to the bride and groom the server boys where missing *yes they were my cousins and softball gang* the priest gave a loud yell and out came the server boys. The priest was holding the microphone when he gave the 2 boys a warning about fooling around during mass. Everyone in church heard it and started to giggle then priest said “Silence please” and continued with the ceremony. That was a funny moment…heheh.

After the ceremony we all went to the photo studio to take pictures. My sister had to take her shoes off because she looked taller then her husband. I looked horrible in the group wedding picture. I looked so dark because of the sunburn. I don’t recall anything about the wedding reception in the afternoon, I’m not sure where I was at that time but as soon as I noticed my sister and my new brother in law had left, I felt so sad and started to miss my sister so I went to look for her. She was at her mother in laws place not very far from my grand father’s house. I hang out with them for a while until my sister asked me to go home, get some rest and get ready for the dinner. As I was walking back I saw my group of softball gang playing in the field, I was tempted and joined them again. 6pm my brother Clifton came to drag me back home with his BMX bicycle. I stood at the back as my brother cycle the bicycle really fast and off we went round the settlement and forgot to go home… hehehe everyone was to busy to notice we were gone anyway.

*2nd day still* The Grand Dinner!!!! What a mess that was, everything went on as planned of cause. I remember seeing so many people and I didn’t know any of them. I asked my sister “Who are these people” and she said “How the hell would I know!, all mommies and my in laws people la!!”.. heh!. Anyway, My uncle’s band “The Ghost Riders” played that night, they were awesome!! People dancing everywhere, free flow of beer and food, it was one big fiesta! I remember the look on my sister and brother in laws face… they were happy but very tired. The wedding ended at 2am.

Sunday, 3rd day! “Branu” I’m not sure if I spelled it correctly or not heheheh but it’s another dinner party but only for immediate family, friends and all the people who helped with the wedding preparations. It’s a tradition where the newly weds have to serve the guests everything from food to drinks. It was interesting because each time they served something people will pass remarks, advise, make silly comments, jokes and they just have to accept it.. hehehe. Most Portuguese families in Malacca don’t practice this tradition anymore. They should, It was fun!.

After witnessing what my sister went through during her wedding, I don’t think I want that if I ever get married. It’s suppose to be a special and happy day not a nightmare or disaster!!. If it was me, I imagine a nice religious ceremony, a small reception dinner with family and close friends. Minimum 50 people not more then 100. I don’t want to spend thousands of dollars for 1 day. Nothing fancy so that all the arrangements can be plan by me, plain and simple but memorable. That’s my idea of a perfect wedding. But if the in laws or my side of the family want to invite their relatives and friends, we can always organize a nice dinner or gathering another day to celebrate... That’s how I would want it to be…heheh ok what!

Anyway, I’m too young to think about settling down. I’m enjoying my life to the fullest and I don’t intend to give it all up at the moment. I like the “Live wild be free” concept…hhehe I’m hopeless really. Who ever marries me is a very unlucky man and who ever does better have this qualities… HE better be a good cook because I certainly can’t, HE must be able to wash forks and spoons.. I’ll wash everything else in the sink except those… I always leave the forks and spoons out I don’t know why, HE must be able to work a washing machine without blowing things up… not like I blew things up or anything like that while washing clothes…. Ok! But I’ve seen it happen before.

Until my next blog… Adios!